I Remember When……

………was a writing prompt given to me as part of the Hay House Writer’s Community Assignment. Like many people, I have been told that my life story would make a good book, and so in this time of “plenty of time on my hands” I thought now was the time to look into it. And so I joined in Hay House’s 7 day online writing challenge at the end of July, and then joined their community soon after.

The idea of a writing prompt is that you set a timer for 7 minutes, and write freely from the given prompt. Before I sat down to do this one, I mulled over in my head what I would write about. Would it be “I remember when…..you could see people’s faces when you went shopping”, or “you shook a stranger’s hand when you were introduced to them”? Would I be taken back in time to a childhood memory, of a summer holiday maybe?

Just before I started the timer, I drew a Starseed oracle card, and this shaped my writing as I will explain after my freefall writing

This is my 7 minute writing:

I remember when…..it felt like we had the freedom to travel wherever and whenever we chose, but that freedom was an illusion. We were restricted by so many things, ferry timetables, plane schedules, and of course, the ability to pay for the tickets. When we got to a new destination, we were reliant on a museum, art gallery or park being open. I remember when I eagerly looked forward to holidays, exploring new places, new cultures, a chance to visit fantastic natural wonders. But this was only when the tour companies ran their tours, or when the coach, bus, train etc was going. Even having the ability to drive, we relied on petrol stations being open along the way to ensure that you had enough petrol. We were not free to just wander in, as and when we liked. Our freedom was an illusion.

I remember when trips to the seaside meant going on the coach that was arranged by your dad’s work, for their summer outing. I remember the train to Swansea. Looking forward to getting to the tunnel, the highlight of the journey, when the whole outside world became pitch black and you could see yourself reflected back in the train window.

(END of seven minute timer)

Prior to this writing prompt, I felt drawn to the Starseed Oracle and drew the card “Hiraeth” a Welsh word for “longing for home” or homesickness. The booklet explains “This yearning can lead some Starseeds to travel to find a physical place that feels more like home” I was reminded of the woman who I worked with in London, who asked me what I was running away from, with all my yearning to travel? That question resonated with me, and set me on a path to discover what it was I was running from. But not for another 7 or 8 years. It took a tragic episode in my life before I really started to understand what it was that I was running from and finally start to unpick the past, and realise what it was. It was “the fire of life” which has turned me into the star that I am.

For many years I thought of myself as a diamond. Once I started to discover my self-worth, I saw myself as something that had been formed from immense pressures, but maybe in reality I am a star. I know very little about stars, and how they come into being, but I have a feeling I am about to learn a whole lot more. if you, my reader know anything about them, please share in the comments.

As I removed the Hiraeth card from the pack, another card was revealed, the “I remember” card. It struck me as pertinent that it was “hidden” behind the Hiraeth one, just as I was about to write with a prompt “I remember when…..” I thought that sometimes what we seek needs a little bit of searching for, God doesn’t always put it right under our noses, it is not always right on top and obvious. So I read about that card too.

“There was a moment before you were born, when you chose the conditions of life you’re living right now!…..We live in a world of free will….it takes courage and faith to take the destiny path that your Soul has chosen.”

Well reading that made me realise how far my Soul has come on it’s journey. Several years ago I would have been angry at the thought that I had “chosen” to be adopted, chosen to live the life that I had. OK when you are an adult you can chose what to do. But as a child? Can I really say “I chose” that experience? Several years ago I would have said no, but now, when I reflect on the fire that I have gone through, to make me a JoySmith, then I accept that it was necessary, and welcome the moulding that that experience has given me.

“Are you strong enough to follow your destiny, to trust the path your Soul is calling you to?” Hell YEH!

Let’s free fall through space, through the stars, and let’s see where it takes us.

“You’re being invited to remember your Souls greater plan and to surrender to it”

You, the reader, if you are still with me, will possibly not understand the joy that this brings me, the feeling of excitement. The excitement of stepping onto a path where few, if any have gone before.

I am standing on the threshold of going somewhere new…to the stars. My friend in London asked the wrong question, when she asked me what I was running away from. I wasn’t running away from anything, I was trying to find a place that I could call home.

On my earthly travels, I have often wondered how it must have felt for all those early explorers, going out into the unknown. Were they scared?

Possibly, but did they feel what I am feeling right now…excited…bursting with anticipation…full of joy..of going somewhere where no earthly person has gone before.

I AM GOING HOME